Why do I get such pleasure from throwing away his toothbrush?

I broke up with Doug this week. We weren’t going in the same direction so I had to end it. He wanted a casual relationship dressed in a serious relationship’s clothing. Kind of strange, actually, that was a first for me. Nice guy, he just needs a little time to get his new life formed. I told him pretty much right off that I am looking to get married. Not to him necessarily, but that is the goal. Casual if fun, but I am done with it. No hard feelings.

But I get such pleasure in throwing away the toothbrush. Wonder why?

When it rains it pours

This week has been a whirlwind of social activities. When it rains it pours! Does that happen to you? I met Kani, from IntellectConnect, on Monday at the Four Courts; dinner at David Greggory with my friend Linda who was here from Florida for a few days; Wed. I bailed on MeetUp; Thurs. is yoga night. Tomorrow I volunteer and then go to the Walters with Christina. Sunday I am meeting Young Dave, finally, for a beer.

The Highlight

The trip to Gettysburg last Saturday with the Capital Hiking Club was so much fun. Our guide, Larry, was a wealth of information. And there were other Civil War buffs/experts on the hike who added even more information.

All of the people in our group were so pleasant and easy to talk to. Ages ranged from 10 to 70-ish, men, woman, singles, couples. In the end I am so glad I went alone. I had invited the Craiglist girls but no one ended up signing up. That group is getting on my nerves, but more about that later. If I had been with people I knew, I don’t think I would have mingled. So alone can be better.

And I even got a date out of it! Bonus. I was totally not expecting that.

Tonight I am off to Sears to buy a new garbage disposal. My glamorous life!

Knitting

I posted the before and after dimensions and pictures of the French Market Bag to Flickr (see the box in the right column). I would say it shrunk about 25% in the felting process in the washing machine. I have a feeling it won’t shrink so much when hand-felted. But I need to do some experimenting.

First Felted Bag

Knitting

Here’s my finished French Market Bag. Isn’t is cool? I am really excited about this felting thang. I am thinking Christmas presents.

Here’s the before picture so you can see how much is shrunk. Pretty dramatic.

When I was in RI last week I used my mother’s washing machine to perform my first felting experiment. I would say it was a success. I feared that the two purples that I chose were too subtle next to each other but they aren’t at all in the finished piece.

While this whole thing was easy to knit and the felting is cool, the shape of this bag is not going to be that useful for me I don’t think. The sides aren’t really that high and the straps aren’t long enough.

But next time I will know how to alter the pattern. I also think the next time I will hand felt which will give me more control. The washing machine was pretty rough and I left it in about 8 minutes, a little longer than I had wanted, but I got distracted watching “What Not to Wear.”

Love that show. And the few episodes I caught when I was getting my fill of cable TV at my parents house featured very willing and cooperative participants. Sometimes they are awful, kicking and screaming through every step, from new clothes, to hair, to makeup. Jeez, they are making you over, have fun with it.

Dating

Well, I think I am inadvertently online dating again.

In my daily scouring I regularly saw a post on Craigslist for Seeking Intellectually Curious Who Love Fine Arts? Have you seen it?

So I click on the above mentioned post to find intellectconnect.com, a new free online dating and friending site. I questioned whether I was smart enough for these potential dates. But I jumped in (I think the FREE was the hook I needed), created a profile, and then kind of forgot about it. Until I got a response a couple of weeks ago from a man who seems charming, nice, looking for friends, likes cultural pursuits, lives nearby in Woodley Park. So we are meeting next week for a beer.

I say inadvertently because this past spring when Gabriel just simply stopped calling and returning my calls, after a year of dating, I decided to take a break. So my focus has been on meeting people to do things with, like hiking, museums, going out to dinner, all the things you do with a boyfriend but without the complications of actually having to consider another person. (Yikes that sounds selfish. But you get my point.)

So I met that group of women on Craigslist and I have become involved in MeetInDC and meetup.com, and a few other things. And it’s all coming together, the work is paying off and I am meeting some new people and have some fun things on my calendar.

Like tomorrow I am going to Gettysburg with the Capital Hiking Club. I have never been to a Civil War site – shame on me, living in the South and all. I don’t know anyone on the trip, but that’s part of the adventure. I have an introverted personality so I have to force myself to do social things by myself. This will be a good exercise for me.

Just for laughs, I recently trolled around match.com, the old stompin’ ground, and all I saw were the same old faces, reading the same old profiles (“I am comfortable in a jean and a tux,” “I SCUBA dive and climb mountains, all in the same day,” “Looking for my soul mate as long as she looks like a super model”) so I give up on the online dating scene.

I had fun over the many years on match, met tons of men, went out on tons of dates, but I am done with that.

Speed Dating Virgin

My friend Corey tried speed dating for the first time last night and he is hooked. He is already setting up the next venue, insisting that I go with him.

Have you tried it? Was it worth it? Did you meet interesting people?

Tell me what you think. I am actually considering it. I really have nothing to lose.

And Rob Brezsny keeps telling me to reinvent myself every week this year.

Young Dave?!?

So I was flipping through the Weekend section of the Post a few minutes ago and I came to the feature story about all the ways to meet people in D.C. when you are feeling at a loss for friends or people to do stuff with. I can relate, that is how I met the Craigslist girls (we have our second date tomorrow, btw). I glance at the picture of the two outdoorsy looking guys and read the caption, “A few years ago, Dave Connolly, left…”

What?

Young Dave!?! Yup, that’s him alright. In all of his youth and cuteness.

I got back up off the floor, caught my breath, wiped the tears from by eyes and dove into the story about Dave’s quest to meet people in D.C. I could tell the story myself. He had these two friends that recently had married and moved to Seattle and he talked about them all the time. He really missed them – I wish I could remember their names. I think they started w/the same letter.

A while back I met Dave on Craigslist and we dated for a little while. He was much younger than me, about 10 years, so I dubbed him Young Dave so my friends could remember who I was talking about. I remember watching “The Ring” with him. That is the last horror flick I have watched. He was so sweet, but the age difference was pretty evident. He was probably 25 at the time.

But I would love to say hi to him, see how he is doing. I emailed the Post reporter who wrote the story and asked for his email address. What do I have to lose?

Another small-world DC story.

The Postmortem

The first date went really well, thank you. There were 5 of us so the group size was perfect for talking. We met at Lebanese Taverna in Pentagon City, and sat outside. Alexis, Melissa, Carol, and Kristanne were great, low-key, interesting, friendly, and smart so we had plenty to talk about. I can't wait to get together again.

I think timing and karma play a role in these things, but I would recommend posting or responding to a "meet some new people" ad on Craigslist. I think there are a lot of people out there looking to make some new friends but aren't quite sure how to do it. Carol, who posted the ad, told us she had gotten many responses to the ad, more than she had expecteda. And when I told my 50-something friend at work, she was all over the idea.

I have a first date tonight

with a bunch of new women I met on Craigslist. I answered a post seeking women in my age range who are looking for people to do stuff with. “No whiners or attention mongers.”

That would be me! So about half of the group is meeting tonight at Lebanese Taverna at Pentagon Row for some hummus and chit chat. (The irony is I was there on Monday for lunch with a vendor. So my annual trips to Pentagon Row has doubled to two. My world is so small sometimes.)

I am looking forward to it, actually. My group of friends has dwindled as people have moved away, gotten married, and/or had kids. While I don’t mind doing things alone, it’s just not as fun a lot of the time.

Maybe my friend-life will be more successful than my love-life is right now.

How could I have missed “dominant male seeking submissive female”?

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It's not all that boring around here

So much going on around here, starting with the excitement of protesters in front of the National Cathedral last night. We haven’t had that much activity since Reagan’s funeral.

I knew that there would be a protest on Wisconsin and my timing was perfect. I parked the car and as I approached the corner I saw the Larouche people and laughed to myself and was disappointed that this was all we were getting.

But then I turned the corner to a crush of people with flags and bull horns, yelling things in English and a language I did not understand except for “Hezbollah” and “Iran” and “terrorist.” I pushed my way through to my building, feeling like I don’t live in THAT boring of a neighborhood.

#2
The second most exciting thing is that I posted my ad in the City Paper matches earlier this week and finally I am getting some online-dating-action.

Match.com has crashed and burned in my opinion. It was my source for dating for years. I was meeting interesting, nice men all the time. I re-upped about a month ago and nothing. No winks, no emails, nothing. So I started responding to people. And again, nothing. Not even a polite thanks-but-no-thanks.

Whatever.

But the City Paper has come through for me.

Meeting SP on Sunday for coffee, and probably A, too. Yippee. The dry spell is over.

#3
Coming in third, the temp at work this week. The straight girls and gay boys are all atwitter. We have very little eye-candy around the office so this is very big.

I missed my calling

Have you ever noticed the music at the DSW in Bailey’s Crossroads? It’s really great 80s music. It’s like the soundtrack from high school: the Jam, Cyndi Lauper, Depeche Mode, Cure, the Smiths. I must be their demographic, although 90% of their shoes I wouldn’t or couldn’t wear. I did find a pair of sneakers, though, just what I was looking for.

At lunch last week I went over to The Phillips Collection to see the Paul Klee exhibit. I have never been much of a fan of Klee's work, but now that I am a card-carrying-member of the Phillips I feel an obligation to see all of their exhibits to get my money's worth. A trip to the Phillips is always worthwhile. If you don't like the special exhibition, you can always find some great pieces wandering around. Like the two Van Gogh's I saw. Gorgeous!

I am in the middle of home-repair drama. One issue is replacing the light fixture in the kitchen. I was at the Home Despot three times last week. But I think I have it figured out. Wednesday I am making tacos and Corey’s coming over to help one last time. He’s such a dear friend, he came over late one night last week in my time of need. That &*(%$ fixture!

The other is the new fridge that is not working right. Don’t get me started.

Knitting
Believe it or not, I AM knitting. And have some stuff to share next time. I am on a roll.

Dating
Nothing to report on the match.com front.

Nothing at all.

I blame the endorphins

In a moment of weakness, I rejoined match.com today. I so did not want to do it, but after a long walk around NW and the National Zoo this beautiful day, my endorphins were pumping and I caved.

(Or maybe it was the Flying Dog, on my empty stomach.)

There are many things I want to do, but don’t want to do them alone, so I don’t know why I am being coy about meeting new people online. Match is my old stand-by, a place I know I will meet decent men to go out with and do things.

To add to my torture, I read G’s profile which he has rewritten and is total BS. I have to give him credit, he is an excellent writer. I used to love reading his email, it was so eloquent without being gushy.

Anyway, his profile goes on and on about how 2 people can like different things but still make a connection. He is paraphrasing me! He broke up w/me because he didn’t think we had enough in common!! OMG

My stance with him was that when 2 people come together they share their interests. It is one way to get to know another person. How boring would it be to date someone who does the exact same activities as you? He was like, ‘my free time is precious and I want to do the things I want to do.’ Sheesh. What is up w/that?

I don’t have any bad feelings toward him at all. But it is still painful to see an ex back up on match.com. Repeating my sentiments.

Sniffle. I miss him. I had fun with him.

Chakra this

This weekend I took an energy medicine class at Spiral Flight yoga studio. It was about opening up the 2nd chakra. I am really curious about the chakras so I was excited to see their series of workshops on each of the 7 chakras. I got so much out of the class and felt great after.

This is my first experience in new agey stuff outside of my regular yoga class. As I expected, there were a few characters in the class. Translation: people who share WAY too much and have much looser boundaries than me.

In my 5+ years doing yoga, I have learned to avoid people who have weird energy and sit clear across the room from them. That is usually all it takes for me to block them out. But this one pair, A and L, were too freaking much. I immediately sensed her so I stayed clear and tried my best to be nonjudgmental. But I can only take so much weirdness!!

She was bossing H around as we were setting up. “Get me some mats. I need a blanket. I need a pillow. Orange if there is one.”

Ugh. L was so accommodating. And she talked to him in this loud, authoritative, do-it-now voice that was heard by everyone. It’s a tranquil, yoga studio for cripes sakes.

Her intention (we all had to make one) for the class was to create healthy boundaries, one of the many facets of the 2nd chakra. But it is such a freaking cliché. And what about her boundaries with poor, mealy-mouthed L? The irony.

And the cherry on top was that she is studying to be an energy medicine practitioner!!

Good luck with that.

Om

Have you noticed how big the toothpaste aisle has gotten? What gives.

Practically all of the toothpaste is now "whitening." It's a bunch of lies, people. My dentist told me it will not do anything to make your teeth whiter and a dental hygienist-friend of mine told me that over time, it damages the enamel on your teeth. To that end, I don't use them because they make my teeth sensitive and quite frankly, my teeth are white enough!

But what really ticks me off is that Crest doesn't make my tartar control gel anymore and my dental health is being affected. I went for my bi-annual cleaning yesterday and the hygienist was scratching away much long and harder than she ever has before. Even she commented because my cleanings are usually so easy! I swear the culprit is the toothpaste. Now I am stuck using Colgate of some kind or another.

Have you tried the new flavors? Toothpaste is supposed to me MINTY people! Not vanilla or rocky road or key lime.

Case in point. Last year I was dating this guy and once in a while I was brushing my teeth at his place. Every time I was in his bathroom, brushing, I would start gagging. At first I thought it was all the stubble in the sink, grossing me out. It took a few days for me to realize it was the vanilla-mint toothpaste.

Good thing I had my yoga class tonight to calm my nerves and get centered.

I am being tempted to get back on Match.com (G broke up w/me a few weeks back, declaring that we did not have enough in common. Whatever!).

Talk me down, people! But I have found it is the best, most consistent way to meet people.

Now the quality of the people varies, and it takes so much energy.

I think I just talked myself out of it.

Thank goodness for yoga!


oommmmm