Thursday, September 01, 2005

Socks Nation

Knitting
The #5s haven’t arrived yet and last night I needed a new project so I started socks.

If these come out OK I will give them to someone for Christmas, maybe my mother.

I took a sock knitting class this past spring. Here is what I made.

I really did have every intention of finishing the second one, errr even finishing the first one. Now that I am on my own, it’s a little intimidating. I am not sure about gauge and needle size so I am winging it.

WEBS is donating 10% off all sales through Sept. 10 to the Red Cross Hurrican Relief Fund.

Dating
I haven’t written much lately about the dating life. I guess I am so conflicted that I don’t have a coherent thought in my head.

Charles and I were supposed to go to Luigi’s for dinner last night. The plan was to meet here at 7PM. The phone rings at 6:45. He is stuck at the office, let’s move it to 8:00. OK, fine, I remain calm, don’t let this snafu bug me. Work happens.

So I change back into my shorts and walk over to Christina’s to pick up the eggs and fruit she is giving me because she is overrun w/fresh, organic produce and eggs and will be away for a while.

Come back, put my out-to-dinner clothes back on and wait. 8:00. 8:05 still giving him the benefit of the doubt. 8:15, start fuming. 8:21, brrrring, brrring.

“This was a really hard call to make. Blah blah. I know you’re going to chew me out, but I am still at the office waiting for something to be delivered. This never happens. Blah blah blah. Blah. Blah blah.”

“Ok, bye,” I mutter.

No dinner, no date.

I burst into tears. Why do these things hurt me so much? My rational mind is like chill, it’s not that big a deal. But my irrational mind takes it so personally. Plus all that is going on in NOLA and the entire Gulf coast right now is getting me down.

I can barely watch it on TV, I listened to about 10 minutes of Diane Rehm this morning and had to turn it off. I find it so emotionally draining. This was my reaction after 9/11, too. After a week straight of watching it on TV, I just had to turn it off.

I remember that day vividly. At the time I had a plot in the community garden in my neighborhood. I went over there to get away from it all. I am minding my own business, enjoying a beautiful afternoon with my plants and I suddenly hear this very loud plane which extra-unusual because National Airport was closed. I look up and nothing is there. But it’s so loud. And then I realize it’s a fighter jet, patrolling D.C.’s airspace. I look really long and hard in the cerulean sky and find it. A tiny little dot making all that freaking noise. That was a very freightening moment. And there was no escape.


And then there’s Dave. Very nice, steady, even keeled, vanilla, Dave. He is coming back tomorrow so I need to make up my mind about him. If he wasn’t such a flat-liner I might be more attracted to him.

Charles is the challenge. He brings excitement, for good or for bad.

Dave is predicable. He’s pleasant, polite, easy to talk to. All the qualities you look for in a guy- on paper.

Ugh.

I always read that we continue in our “pattern” until we suddenly realize what it is. I think I am close to seeing my pattern. That way I can break it. And THEN maybe I will find an acceptable guy who is ready for a relationship.

And all of this is why I started knitting socks last night. Amazing how it is all connected.

Other Amusements
I am off tomorrow, hooray. My last long weekend. Not sure what I will do. Maybe drive to North Beach, Md. again. But I haven’t really decided. There is a spa on the boardwalk that takes walk ins…

Charles just asked me to fly to St. Louis with him tomorrow. I would really like to go to St. Louis w/him one of these weekends to see the house he is refurbishing. But there’s this little thing of buying a plane ticket 2-weeks in advance. So is he serious, or is he playing with me. These are the thoughts that run through my head.

I digress.

I am going to help Corey move into a temporary apartment in Greenbelt, Md. on Monday. He is condo-hunting, but has to move out of his cousin’s house because she is cashing out and moving to Bowling Green, with a huge wad a cash in her pocket. More power to you, Hoxie!

It’s nice when someone actually profits from the nutty D.C. housing market. We are all rich on paper, but unless you are moving to a rural area or the Midwest, you have squat.


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